Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Ten things we never knew about Osama
1.He wanted to kill president Obama well f*^# me is that a real turn of events ...really he wanted to kill a lot of people he was head of AL- quieda ,he was a terrorist after all and the president of the USA was after him ...here's a thought ,he killed a lot of people in new york
2.he fantasized about blowing up oil tankers hey get in line people who have those gas guzzling suv's and hummers who only get 2.2 miles to the gallon maybe have the same fantasies although they have jobs and kids and shit ...and they really have BBQ,s and wives that bitch and moan if they do not mow the lawn .....
3.He was a hoarder ,well this is not a biggy ...go to many garages in America and you will not see cars parked in there but shit give a person room and they will fill it with shit ...is this a revelation...bollocks i say ..public storage is a multi million dollar business because people cant get rid of shit ....
4.Now here is why i like the guy ......he had an extensive porn collection ...welly well o well really .......wow !!! i mean why the f*^#@ not ...what guy does not have a porn collection ( most guys have a secret place form the missus unless she like the old flicker....) Every guy should have a porn collection if not why not ....who does not want to see a hot babe ( and of course if you are a babe and like porn then guy .......or if you are a switch hitter then either or! )
5. He liked to watch himself ...what the hell does that mean !!!! doing what/where/how/and why...that's is a subject that i am not really going into when people say they like to watch themselves is that a showbiz thing or a kink thing,...johnny depp says he never likes to watch himself on TV or his movies ...but that's johnny depp ..you expect that from johnny depp ,i guess it might be a terrorist thing or something narcissistic.....not for me this subject.
6.He felt threatened by the Arab Spring ....i mean what the hell is that ......i mean is that like the Arab version of Irish spring soap
...i personally thought the guy never washed maybe once in a blue moon i am not sure of his cleaning ritual
..i know i cannot stand the advertisement for Irish Spring soap it has some really annoying pseudo Irishman walking along the hills and shit and talking about freshness i am sure this has no correlation with Arab spring because i have never seen it advertised unless its on AL tweezeras or whatever it is called ..i hate the smell of Irish spring it smells nothing of Ireland .......
7.He was largely isolated and flailing ....well who the hell wants to sit and eat popcorn and watch family guy and the Simpson's with the most wanted dude on the planet ...hey fame does strange shit ...Frank Sinatra was isolated and flailing so was j.d Salinger and Stanley Kubrick ....maybe he just hated hanging round a bunch of guys annoying his ass when he was watching porn ...
8.He was delusional....well what guy is not delusional .
I think i have bouts of delusion i tend to think i may one day find a deaf/dumb/and blind version of Nicole shrezinger ..with the cans of Heidi klum and her dad is a mechanic her brother is a laptop repair specialist and her uncle has a gun store .
.what guy is not delusional ...look at the American govt ..the secret service tried to get a cheap hooker ...that my friends is delusional ...the apple does not drop far he is normal here
9.He was depressed and wanted to re-name al-quieda......boo hoo -sob what the hell was he going to call it .....dudes with table clothes.....men in strange hats ....Arab spring......AL -denti- new york cab co .....al quieda pizza and hot dogs ....geez that's the least of your problems when the worlds mercenaries are looking for your ass you have way more things to be depressed about than a fricking name .....
10. he was the last word on terrorism ,yes he also had ...Saddam Hussein he really screwed up the atmosphere by setting fire to a hundred and 20 odd wells thus causing an air vacuum in the planet and using up 25 years of air and pollution by what he did but we do not care about that because we all know global warming is a business right !!! .
. and colonel Qaddafi the self made man of fashion he had better designers working for him that Gianni versace his clothes were outrageous not to mention he had a guy do hair plugs for him ( maybe the same guy that does Joe bidens ) and plastic surgery to look young hey when your stealing a countries wealth whats the difference your getting all your shit done for free at the people's expense so ya got to look good when you are being hunted ..
.he might have used the same hairdressers as the the real housewives of orange county ....
although his sunglasses were second to none .....
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