From time to time i like to write poems as i will submit them in here ..its always a good place to store them ...
All poems are from my book soon to be finished...in the spring of 2022..or2023 or maybe 4...........sometime?
Bathtub poetry ...ramblings of a Scotsman ..............
Worshipping the porcelain goddess
as i lie here in my bed,
i think threes a freight train passing through my head.
i do not know what i was thinking,
last night when i was drinking.
yes! we all love to joke ,
i go partying with jack Daniels ,he loves coke
my body aches my face looks like a mess ,
here i am worshipping the porcelain goddess.
As i endeavour in the technicolour scream ,
i can taste in my mouth ,my friend Jim beam.
my stomach is squeezing like a grinders organ,
here's comes the last of captain Morgan.
My body is is a state of total distress.
as i sit here worshipping the porcelain goddess.
the bowl is full and my body is aching ,
how much more puke can this bowl be taking.
I can smell the odor of tequila and lime,
but all i am doing is throwing up slime.
i did not take the time to undress,
as i am covered in puke
worshipping the porcelain goddess
So no more drinking for me ,
but that will only last till i smell another apple martini.
so i will only have to guess
how long it will be before i am a
worshipping the ..porcelain goddess.......
written extract from my book 2001.....
...............................................................................................................................................................
Bizarre
| . |
50'000 cross dressing Elvis impersonators,
performing in a public restroom in Boyzi Idaho.
mother Theresa doing anal in a porn flick, for a new pair of sandals
faceless clowns performing high wire acts, in a circus tent, made from discarded underwear, found in filthy laundrettes,to an audience of blind midgets .
Alabama police officers dressed in gold lame disco thongs,
handing out coffee and donuts ,to bank robbers and carjackers wearing lipstick.
catwalk models dressed in dogfur'
eating food and throwing up into an audience of still born midgets.
one legged deaf lepers ,serving 2 4 1 cocktails,to tuxedo cigar smoking chimpanzees,on a Parisian sidewalk at 4 am
green bald lesbian alien single mothers with one breast,giving head to intergalactic traffic cops wearing chocolate covered sunglasses
300 lb German female weightlifters dressed in french maid outfits ,licking the riding boots of old dead Auschwitz victims ,while serving hot tea
three shoplifting drugstore cowboys junkies wearing Ronald Reagan masks,dressed in altar boys outfits,depositing body parts of dead rape victims at an all night ATM of a human bank
five skinhead priests with 50% burns, on their bodies performing opera , at an all night diner,to an audience of seals dressed in army fatigues
emaciated homeless people sipping champagne and eating caviar from the stomach of an 80 year old dead bee keeper from somewhere in Connecticut
BUT OF ALL THE BIZARRE THOUGHTS OR THINGS THAT MAY BE ..THE MOST BIZARRE THING OF ALL ...IS US SOLDIERS AND INNOCENT PEOPLE ....BEING NEEDLESSLY SLAUGHTERED EVERYDAY IN A COUNTRY ......BY PEOPLE WHO WILL NEVER SURRENDER...
..........................................................................................................
Willow Tree
I wished that you were here with me ,
As i sit under the willow tree.
The sun is shining on my face,
as i sit alone in this beautiful place.
The birds are singing ,
and flowers everywhere.
it's a pity you're not here to share.
This beautiful moment here with me .
As i sit alone under the willow tree.
Maybe one day we can sit ,under the trees shade
Before the sun will set and fade.
But i promise this unto you ,
moments like these are far and few.
This is a place you can set yourself free ,
when you join me under the willow tree
It would be a shame to let this moment go by,
As i look up through the branches ,
and see the clear blue sky.
Oh! this moment i would love to share ,
as i pause for a moment ,
and breathe in life's fresh air
I cannot think of a more beautiful place to be ,
as i sit under the willow tree!!!!.......
written in 1998 ......in memory of the greatest man that ever lived .....my father ...dedicated to all the moments i missed with him ........................................
............................................................................................................
Before the demise of Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein , he was responsible for a lot of things ,but many govt heads and people blamed for other stuff ...so i wrote a poem and based it on people blaming everything on Saddam Hussein.....
Blame it on Hussein
.........................................................................................................
a man was riding his bike drunk, in the middle lane
he was hit by a truck
and lost both legs
but he blamed it on Hussein.
My cousin was trimming hedges on PCP
he was out of his brain
he thought his arm was branches and sawed them off ,but
he blames it on Hussein
my best friends cousin uncle was smoking weed
and trying hitch a ride on a train
he was so high he ran in front of it and now he's dead
but they blamed it on Hussein
A friend of mine did too much Ecstasy
and is now insane ,
but doctors at the hospital
Well they blame it on Hussein
A woman was doing heroin
and shot too much in her vein
their family are having a lawyer
to try and sue Hussein
one day in Iraq a man set fire oil wells
and all there was was fire
and lots of black rain ..
i think that was the day
they could blame it on Hussein ..........
............................................................................................................
performing in a public restroom in Boyzi Idaho.
mother Theresa doing anal in a porn flick, for a new pair of sandals
faceless clowns performing high wire acts, in a circus tent, made from discarded underwear, found in filthy laundrettes,to an audience of blind midgets .
Alabama police officers dressed in gold lame disco thongs,
handing out coffee and donuts ,to bank robbers and carjackers wearing lipstick.
catwalk models dressed in dogfur'
eating food and throwing up into an audience of still born midgets.
one legged deaf lepers ,serving 2 4 1 cocktails,to tuxedo cigar smoking chimpanzees,on a Parisian sidewalk at 4 am
green bald lesbian alien single mothers with one breast,giving head to intergalactic traffic cops wearing chocolate covered sunglasses
300 lb German female weightlifters dressed in french maid outfits ,licking the riding boots of old dead Auschwitz victims ,while serving hot tea
three shoplifting drugstore cowboys junkies wearing Ronald Reagan masks,dressed in altar boys outfits,depositing body parts of dead rape victims at an all night ATM of a human bank
five skinhead priests with 50% burns, on their bodies performing opera , at an all night diner,to an audience of seals dressed in army fatigues
emaciated homeless people sipping champagne and eating caviar from the stomach of an 80 year old dead bee keeper from somewhere in Connecticut
BUT OF ALL THE BIZARRE THOUGHTS OR THINGS THAT MAY BE ..THE MOST BIZARRE THING OF ALL ...IS US SOLDIERS AND INNOCENT PEOPLE ....BEING NEEDLESSLY SLAUGHTERED EVERYDAY IN A COUNTRY ......BY PEOPLE WHO WILL NEVER SURRENDER...
..........................................................................................................
Willow Tree
I wished that you were here with me ,
As i sit under the willow tree.
The sun is shining on my face,
as i sit alone in this beautiful place.
The birds are singing ,
and flowers everywhere.
it's a pity you're not here to share.
This beautiful moment here with me .
As i sit alone under the willow tree.
Maybe one day we can sit ,under the trees shade
Before the sun will set and fade.
But i promise this unto you ,
moments like these are far and few.
This is a place you can set yourself free ,
when you join me under the willow tree
It would be a shame to let this moment go by,
As i look up through the branches ,
and see the clear blue sky.
Oh! this moment i would love to share ,
as i pause for a moment ,
and breathe in life's fresh air
I cannot think of a more beautiful place to be ,
as i sit under the willow tree!!!!.......
written in 1998 ......in memory of the greatest man that ever lived .....my father ...dedicated to all the moments i missed with him ........................................
............................................................................................................
Before the demise of Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein , he was responsible for a lot of things ,but many govt heads and people blamed for other stuff ...so i wrote a poem and based it on people blaming everything on Saddam Hussein.....
Blame it on Hussein
.........................................................................................................
a man was riding his bike drunk, in the middle lane
he was hit by a truck
and lost both legs
but he blamed it on Hussein.
My cousin was trimming hedges on PCP
he was out of his brain
he thought his arm was branches and sawed them off ,but
he blames it on Hussein
my best friends cousin uncle was smoking weed
and trying hitch a ride on a train
he was so high he ran in front of it and now he's dead
but they blamed it on Hussein
A friend of mine did too much Ecstasy
and is now insane ,
but doctors at the hospital
Well they blame it on Hussein
A woman was doing heroin
and shot too much in her vein
their family are having a lawyer
to try and sue Hussein
one day in Iraq a man set fire oil wells
and all there was was fire
and lots of black rain ..
i think that was the day
they could blame it on Hussein ..........
............................................................................................................
Every year Americans celebrate thanksgiving with turkey,i decided to write a pom through the eyes of a turkey........
....................................................................................................................................................................
It sucks to be a Turkey at thanksgiving
.............................................................................................................
Thanksgiving comes but once a year,
in the coop there is the smell of fear .
it sucks to be a turkey at thanksgiving
As we shed some tears in our eyes,
we are all preparing for our good byes.
It sucks to be a turkey at thanksgiving ...
I know we only have a year ,
but as i reminisce about the females in here .
since this is my last chance ,
i may as well get some rear.
It sucks to be a turkey at thanksgiving.
oh! well what the heck
they will pull out all my feather and wring my neck
It sucks to be a turkey at thanksgiving .....
The coop is filled with sobbing and sighs ,
we are all saying our last goodbyes.
because we know someone will be eating our thighs,
It sucks to be a turkey at thanksgiving.
It,s a short life a hell of a fate ,
the thought of ending up .
with cranberries on a plate .
it sucks to be a turkey at thanksgiving.
Alas my life has come to pass
i hate the thought
of being crapped out someones ass...........
It sucks to be a Turkey at thanksgiving...........
Extract from bathtub poetry ....thanksgiving 1999
........................................................................................................
Neighbors
They moved to our street about a year ago,
They never look over and say hello..........
every day about four,
their car dissappears under the garage door.......
i would like to invite them over for coffee or tea ,
but i am sure hey would not talk to me .
i see their lights are on for hours,
they never have BBQ,s
Or even plant flowers.
they,have their blinds always drawn ,
before the sun comes up
they are up and gone .
I really don't know why
they really don't try
and be like us ......neighbors
............................................................................................................................................................
........................................................................................................
Neighbors
They moved to our street about a year ago,
They never look over and say hello..........
every day about four,
their car dissappears under the garage door.......
i would like to invite them over for coffee or tea ,
but i am sure hey would not talk to me .
i see their lights are on for hours,
they never have BBQ,s
Or even plant flowers.
they,have their blinds always drawn ,
before the sun comes up
they are up and gone .
I really don't know why
they really don't try
and be like us ......neighbors
............................................................................................................................................................
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