salt and butter

I like everyone else .....
Do not mind venturing myself to a new culinary venture ....... I  not a great lover of food however ...... I find it overrated and pretentious mostly ........ Especially when you get the likes of the most annoying personality in the culinary world ...... SALT BAE....... He makes claims of his oppulant life style ...... And his iconic stature in the culinary world ..... However my bone of contention...... Is like him he cooks everything in salt and butter ....... Which if anyone knows it fools the taste buds ....... And as we all know ...... That only two percent of the population has gourmet taste buds ...... The rest have gourmond ......... Which means they really cannot taste good on a culinary level ........ That compiled if you drink wine........ or smoke ....... It paralyse the taste sensors ........ With that in mind ...... This is why chefs douse their food in salt and butter ........ But you all knew that I am sure ........... And I am sure a side bar to all this information to you carnivorous masses ...... That meat is actually flavourless ...... It's flavoured by muric acid ....... And wtf is that you may Ask yourself .......... The is god's delightful way of letting you know one of his animal .... With the help of some magic chemical called adrenalin ..... Pissed it's self in total fear ..... And injected the meat ....... No!!!!! you say ....... Yes!!!!!..... you are paying money to eat piss injected meat ....... And to add to this delightful circus of culinary deceit...... and complexity ....... You lovely red meat that you buy at the supermarket ...... Is red .... By the miracles of science ......carbon monoxide ...... Yes..... the same stuff ......that people use in car exhaust to commit harry carry .....you know putging a hose from the exhaust inside the car .....but it's safer ......but delivered in a safer way to fool you into thinking you are getting that delicious steak ........ Oh! No.!!!!!!!...... you are welcome please ...... Don't thank me ...... Thank the cow for all his .....or her hard work in getting to that point ....... However salt and butter spans into more than just steak.......watch any cooking show you will see they sprinkle salt on everything ......it's because most food is fucking bland ......and .....you see them throw in butter .
....sometimes a stick ..... Most people don't give a fuck ...... As long as they can shove food in their pie hole .......... That and five .... Six or seven beers ...... That always masks the food too ...... And you might be wondering why do I care so much ....... Well I fucking don't ....... I just thought you should know ......in case you don't you do now ....... Chefs could not make good food without salt and butter ....... Or sodium .... Either or ...... Now everytime you see cooking show you will see ....... It's one of the best food scams perpetrated upon human beings ...... So next time you go to that pretentious ... Avant garde ..... Bohemian..... wannabe restaurant .... Where your waiter tells you about their specialties of sauteed buttcrack mushrooms .....and wild tomato sauce..... and freshly made pasta ...... And farm to table veggie pasta dish ..... Ask him no salt or butter please ......
.not going to happen ...... Enjoy!!!!!!!..yum yum pigs bum ...... ....... 

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