my reason for being against family

someone asked me the other day .....why do i hate family .....and  kids .......and  all things marriage ......and  all related stuff in a and around raising children .......

well first of ......i love kids they are great ......and i am totally  opposed to child hunger.... and  abuse on any level ......

and the reason i am against family is.......  its all lies.....mother  to kids........ and the husbands  have  to  lie to ...... stay in the loop.....

growing up ......i have  great parents ...... and they were  kind..... loving and my dad  was hardworking to keep a family together .......

living in  Glasgow  was  great ....i hated when we  moved ......to a place in Stirling called  Denny .......never felt at home..... lost and  displaced .......

like a cowboy in a city ......i considered being blessed  by having great  parents ......

however ....... being of  three  siblings......two women  .....everything was  fine  until they had  kids ......then reality set in ......

because all i saw  was my parents house  get  constantly wrecked  all the time .....and never  getting peace ......my father  was a  great great man ....a family man .....but my idea of  family is  respect ......

he  never  got respect .......because if he did then his  house  would never  have  gotten wrecked all the time ..... and  my parents never  got peace  ever ....

well they have  all the  peace  now ....... and their  house  does not get wrecked......  because they are passed ......shame that really....... that is  the only  time  they got  peace is  when they are dead....

so  i witnessed a  lot of  family bullshit ......even worse  when kids  came  along .....they i found out  they are a  great  manipulative  bargaining tool ON  getting shit from parents .......

i find  it hard to believe how  some families say they are  happy ....all i saw  was   sister  bitterness ..... jealousy .....fighting .......arguing  backstabbing ......hating ...and  jealousy to point  with kids  involved  one  getting without the other ..... and  of  course  lies .......lies  lots of  lies ......

it seems a  marriage...... and parenting is  all   lies   form inception .....i saw this  on  daily basis  ...

i was left  with an  acrid  feeling toward   family and  having kids  ......after  what i  saw  and  went  through ....

my dad  worked all his life ........and should have  had a  beautiful home ....... but no !!!!it never  got  chance........ i lived  there  through sisters  fighting with each other........ and  their husbands ......even to the point of  physical  violence.....  towards   each other...... and my parents house  getting wrecked .....

funny how their  houses  never  got  wrecked ..... right up until my mother  died ....... the house was so rundown with no hot water ....no front door  locked ........and infested with mice .........and  dampness ........and mould ....it seemed they never  ever  got the  chance  to have beautiful home .....

even when my father got  a car ......he always  wanted even that was set on fire .....but he  as  always said........ it was  par  for the  course ......

he  never  got to  enjoy his life  .....his retirement ....he never  got peace .....

and people  Wonder  why i hate  family.........  and the  things  related to it ....it  caused  me  to see  what the hell is it about  ........  they have to lie ......  even to  a point of  not causing trouble ......

why be a  family if  its  lies ........  parents have to lie   all the  time ......

but My  greatest  disdain was  never  being allowed  to  say anything because it would  start  trouble ....

eventually  i  did ......  and  it  came  with the  price of  losing  what was  left of a  so called  family .....

my father  could never  leave out money .......or   anything  ........ things would  always  get stolen  and  he  could  never  get peace  to  enjoy  anything ......

i think the  biggest  mistake we  ever  made  was  leaving our  city  .....

you can take a man out of the  city but the  city Will always  remain in the man .....always !!!!!!

Even to me this  day ....

i was  blessed  to have  father told  me  whatever  the  cost  tell it like it  is  .......and  this is what i  do ........ on my website ........ and  people  don't like me .......but then  i am not  that bothered   people  eventually  reveal themselves  ....it takes  time  but  the real person will always  crawl out of the  hole  for air .....

i witness   bloodshed ..........  where older siblings husband cut a mans  ear off  after  the  wedding reception ....drunk of course........ and  a blood stained  wedding dress .......  on wedding nights ........and  full on  physical  violence ......... where sibling and  husbands  fought........ a full on fight...... In my Mum and  dads  house  ......... it got wrecked ....this is the  total act of  sheer  disrespect ....and sadness even to a point where my grandmother  fainted ......

and people  wonder  why i am so bitter ....... about family ..... 

i put it down to normality ........and then i saw  some  family........ how their  daughters........ and  sons   respected the parents .........and realized i just  got the shit end of a  stick 

all my parents  did  was  feed and  spend ......... and  bail out ....even in retirement........ they got  stiffed and ripped off ...but now  that's over ......

as i do not  believe enough in the afterlife .......and  have  almost died  a couple  of times ...i am not sure if  we  will all ever  meet again 


i was never a  great  uncle  because i never grovelled or fed egos or played the part of  what  uncles are  meant to do whatever  that is ......

 i  never  really thought  my  family cared  enough  about each other so why should i  ....you can pretend all you want playing Happy families  but  eventually  all gets  revealed ......

i never  get surprised  when people  tell em they have  not spoken  to each otter in years.........  i  had the same  experience..........  only until  tragedy strikes ......... does  one  feel  compelled to  make  a  reunion ..........which i think is  hypocritical........ and  evil  on many  different levels ......

i don't care if   getting older ......... you end up alone....... my  mother  did  ........after all she put into  life ....... she died  in hospital bed ........ all by herself ........ so its  all bullshit ........

i realized that  family is just a game oi  lies....... and fronting ........and  what goes on behind  closed doors  

i never  ceased to be amazed ......... when people play happy couples ........and  later i see  them split ......

i have witnessed  abuse....... physical...... and mental on  levels  that  are  really  not  any likeness  to family ....so when people  tell me they are Happy ......i am  dubious .....

i  mean  religion too ....... in Scotland is  one  thing that causes  problems.........  i saw  religion tear up a family........  and  even  down to the  wedding ......one catholic .........one protestant..........

 and  just because differing  platforms of  worship  for  god  ..........each family would not  attend  theirs so it was  two wedding ......and to think religion is  a pile of  lies ........ based  of  the rendering of  uneducated  drunk prophets .......... and  tales  of  a bad  carpenter and a  fictitious  rebirth  from death ......

well as far  as i  am  concerned  ........death is  final  .....

so i decided to let people  know on  my  website the reason for my bitterness  in my view  towards  family ......it seemed  the only time  that were  good  were  at holidays ........but the   that's a hypocritical event ........or  when someone  is   dying ....... does one  make the attempt ....

i never  had  the  drive or  motivation to  go  home  from across the pond...........  as  the place my parents  lived  was a dump ....... and  to what !!!!lies........  and  pretend ....... we  all liked each other  .....

maybe i lost out on the  creation of a  family......... but  all what i saw  left me  with a bitter  taste  of  what  your meant to  do is  all about ......

everyone wants  to trail a blaze .......and  leave a path or  remembrance in this life  ......

but in essence  ........ after a  while ........ like a candle you  just  burn out.......  that flame  dies  .........and once in a while you are  mentioned.......  because life goes on !!!!!!